kar•ma

(kär mƏ) 

n. 

1. Hinduism & Buddhism The total effect of a person's actions and conduct during the successive phases of the person's existence, regarded as determining the person's destiny.
2. Fate; destiny.
3. Informal A distinctive aura, atmosphere, or feeling: There's bad karma around the house today
4. A balance of good and bad. i.e. Paying off one of your students loans, then coming home to discover your dog had foul, explosive diarrhea in your closet where you pretty much just pile everything on the floor.

they were cones!

Just got this email from my sister:


So...I was watching Say Yes to the Dress, when I hear Kaity say, "I can see why they don't like this".
I turn around to see Kaity wearing the dog's Elizabethan Collar...


It was extra special, 'cause she was wearing a Superman T-Shirt.


I responded with the below...

post-coneheads

Ah fambly.

I made a disturbing discovery yesterday

While searching for “belly rubs” on youtube (trying to find a video of the newest advantix commercial) I found some startling videos.

There are just as many videos of people rubbing their own naked bellies as there are poochs getting belly rubs. One or two sure, I can see that. But it was practically 50/50 – is there a fetish I don’t know about where ‘a bowl full of jelly’ is a turn on? Now don’t get me wrong, I have a respectable jelly belly myself, it just never occurred to me to zoom in on it and jiggle it around or rub it, then post it on youtube.

Hmm. Now that I’m aware of this new fad however...

so close

I got a call from Pizzaville today. They were in my lobby with my pizza and trying to buzz in. After I'm all 'Dude I'm at work. I didn't order any pizza' I checked with Jeremy to see if maybe he ended up calling in sick and wanted food but he was at work too.

We've decided Tonks was trying to order herself a pizza.

Nice try puppy. Better luck next time...

i iz a lego

Here’s me as a lego piece. I found the Lego character generator via generator blog, the place to go for time wasting random generation of goodies. I have spent many hours there.

Anyway I had much fun designing myself, though I turned out a little slutty.

And just for fun I made LEGO RIKER! It actually started as Jeremy but Number 1 just sort of took over.

s-m-r-t

According to a recent study dogs are about as intelligent as 2 year old children. I can believe it. Sometimes Tonks is super smart but other times I wonder if she’s special.

Jeremy directed my attention to the above article and pointed out that Tonks’ lineage puts her on the 10 most intelligent breeds list and the 10 least intelligent breeds list (Labrador and Beagle).

So it looks like one of her parents was ‘an intellectual that was attracted to bimbos’. Ah true love knows no boundaries, even with gogs. Thank goodness for that, otherwise we wouldn’t have this delightful dog.

Um, this must be one of her beagle moments.

still here

Ugh. I’ve been really busy so I haven’t posted anything. I hate that. Writing is the one thing that I’ve always felt should be present, be it a quick note, an alliterative sentence or a dirty limerick. For me there is no excuse. If I wait until I have time to sit and write it just won’t happen. And I’m lazy and relatively obligation free.

I went to Canada’s Wonderland a few weeks ago, for the first time in about 15 years if you can believe it. The prospects for hilarious and clever posts were endless - Jeremy freaked out and wouldn’t go on many of the rides and I wore a low cut top and my boobs kept popping out on the bumpier rides. Fun fun fun. But I put it off and now that’s all I got.

I’ve got to review mascara for the friendly neighbourhood word of mouth marketing company, it’s vibrating. Very cool. I just need to get my sisters’ opinions first. That one is still to come.

Oh and it’s really hot. And STINKY. For those of you who don’t know, I live in Toronto and we are currently in the midst of a garbage strike. I’ve seen the plastic wrapped garbage bins (that people shove garbage in anyway) but it hasn’t really affected me as I’m in an apartment and for now they are taking care of the trash. I just put it down the chute as usual. But this morning I was walking Tonks and the various dumpsters around the area were reeking to high heaven. Quite nasty. I hope they resolve things soon. Before we all start looking like that lady thing in Labyrinth.

Anyway this weekend will be full of strawberry picking and Dungeons and Dragons. Excitement! For the moment I have the day off and am doing sweet sweet nothing. Mmmm dipsalusious.

makes me want to go to the dentist

...and have kids.

those with heart conditions should view the following images at their own risk

I like birds. Little flighty feather fluffs that flit about and roll around in the dirt. Love em. I’ve taken my particular obsession with goldfinches perching on thistle to the next level by tattooing custom artwork on my body, so I can see them anytime I want – even if abducted by aliens and left nude in some sort of biologically constructed prison cell.

But I digress.

Today I made an incredible discovery – the Kinglet. Where on earth has this tiny birdball been all my life?!??

When I first saw it my eyes sort of glazed over and I gasped for air. The adorable quickly overwhelmed me and I slipped into some sort of cute coma. When I regained consciousness my hand was next to my computer screen making pinching gestures towards a delicious Kinglet-belly. As my mind slowly refocused I became aware of a high pitched ‘squeeing’ noise. Turns out it was me.

I think I’ll be okay, I’ve managed to get my heart rate back to normal and my leg has stopped twitching. I’ve made one of these my desktop background to avoid withdrawal symptoms. I periodically minimize my browser so I can see it; I just feel better knowing it’s there.

So there it is. The Kinglet. My life will never be the same. There is a creature in this world that is indeed 99% belly and manages flight.

My mind is totally blown.

I haven’t managed to stop squeeing yet but these things take time.

whatever happened to ed?

Ted Rogers passed away. I’m shocked. His first name is actually Edward!?! Since when is Ted short for Edward?

Apparently shortening of names is not the only way to get a nickname. There was a trend for rhyming nicknames and swapping of letters.

“There was a trend of creating rhyming nicknames (arbitrarily changing the first letter) in the 13th and 14th centuries. That's where we get all these surprising forms like Dick (and Hick!) from Richard, Polly from Molly (for Mary), Bob, Dob and Hob from Rob (from Robert), Bill from Will (from William); and Hodge from Roger.” WikiAnswers

There is a great sense of history when examining linguistics.

“Nicknames of this sort are among the oldest parts of language still used. Jack remained a nickname for John for centuries after its original connection and lost. Until the 20th century, one could still find Neds and Nans for Edwards and Anns, again, although the original connotations have long since past. Some connections are so old that we do not really understand how it happened, as in Peggy/Margaret or Polly/Mary or Billy/William” Edgar’s Namebook

Fascinating.

No really. I’ve always been interested in names. I’ve been buying baby name books since I was in public school. Even though I never knew the Ted/Edward connection it shouldn’t have surprised me so much. I knew about Bess and Elizabeth and Dolly for Dorothy. And those seem just as odd.

Ah Ted Rogers, posthumously stimulating the masses with sociolinguistics. Is there anything you can’t do?

prose before hoes

How can I keep going to this place? Am I really such a beast? So ruled by hormones and chemicals? Such a fine machine, the human body. An impulse, a spark and the system reels. How can you recover from it. There is no starting over, try again. Sorry better luck next time. How about a rematch? I’ll choose my weapons more wisely this time. Promise. Promise I will do better. Try harder, be tougher. Tough skin, tough shell. Hard hard hard. No breaking me down. I probably won’t even notice you, buzzing around. So insignificant you will try to bite and I won’t even flinch. In the meantime, the wind from your tiny wings is ripping my skin. Too delicate for words. The weakest. Just a small imbalance and then chaos. So poorly designed. Whose idea was this anyway.