Friday, August 12, 2005

p.s. i do love jesus

Okay I had no idea what I was going to write about today but I took a stroll on over to Blamblog and couldn’t help but get inspired by his post.

Helping Boys Become Men, and Girls Become Women - outlines how to make sure your kid grows up straight.


Before I comment further I would like to say that I hope I have a gay son, as I will always be the only woman in his life and I won’t have to endure him bringing trampy girls home.

Moving on….

Here are just a few pearls of wisdom you can find:

Signs of gender confusion in boys - A tendency to cry easily, be less athletic, and dislike the roughhousing that other boys enjoy.

Wow! I remember when we were younger my sister went through a phase where she refused to wear skirts or dresses for any reason. Little did we know this was a warning sign of lesbianism. Well too bad this article wasn't around back then. My parent's had no idea that professional help was needed if your child showed such aberrant tendencies. Boys not interested in sports?!? What’s next?!? Dogs and cats living together??!!??

Don’t leave your children of either sex in the care of teenage boys. Furthermore, don’t allow your teenage boy to baby-sit.

Does this mean that all teenage boys are predators? Or that they just can’t help themselves? Well that’s what happens when women start wearing trousers. It’s like having a sign around your neck that says : “I have a vagina!! It’s between the legs you see so clearly defined! Ha ha you cannot escape my powerful vagina!”

Dr. James Dobson reports: “There is also the vigorous effort by gays to infiltrate the Boy Scouts in the same way lesbians have done so successfully in the Girl Scouts, where 33 percent of their staff is said to be lesbian.”

The truth comes out!! Who can resists those neckerchiefs and knee-high socks? Apparently not gay men. Y’gads man! Do you realize what this means? Well… Nothing. Except that the use of the word infiltrate instead of join/enter can make normal actions seem sinister. ‘I need to stop by the bank after work’, ‘ I need to infiltrate the bank after work’. Hm.

Now they do look at it from a scientific point of view and say that
‘One hundred years of research literature was swept away overnight’ when the American Psychiatric Association declared that homosexuality is not a mental disorder. Well you know that sort of thing has happened in the past. The earth being round, revolving around the sun and all that business, did get people in quite a snit. Hey if you’re still miffed about that just google “flat earth”. You’ll find a number of wonderful societies to join. You never have to listen to new ideas ever again!! Just make up your mind and stick to it, no matter what new evidence pops up. Hey it works in politics. You don’t want to be called a flip-flop do you? Oh so now leeches don't cure everything?

Ah I digress…..

If you’ve read my blog for any length of time you’ll know I RARELY if ever, make political, religious or controversial posts. Mostly because I don’t like criticism and want everyone to like me. But this topic just kind of got away from me and as a result I think I’ve filled my sarcasm quota for the rest of the year. I’ll have to start posting nude pictures just to keep everyone’s attention. Oh not of me, I said I wanted to keep your attention.

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