claremy: the naked truth

I was over at OK Cupid, taking some fun little tests when I stumbled across the Dating Persona Quiz. Now back in University Jeremy and I took the dating personality quiz from the Spark (which is now Ok Cupid I believe). I wondered how the test had changed and what my results would be now. Back then I was The Mistress, which my floor mates all found hilariously fitting, for reasons I won’t go into right now. Would it be as eerily accurate all these years later? I wanted to know, so I took the quiz. And was SHOCKED!! At first. I was The Sudden Departure (Random Brutal Love Master). After reading it through several times (and taking the quiz 4 more times) I realized this was me. Both exact and brutal in its precise honesty, this simple test had summed up my life’s relationship experiences. It mentions things like "Serial monogamist is probably something you hear a lot. Emotionally loose is another way to put it”. Yikes. Not too pretty but hey it could have been a lot worse.

So, impressed as I was by this I demanded that Jeremy take it as well. He got The Loverboy (Random Gentle Love Master). What!?! Lover boy? Honestly. He was thrilled, said the picture even looked like him. Uh huh. Anyway we were reflecting on our relationship, okay I was, and I said

“Wow I’m surprised we ever got together in the first place, well this time around, so in the second place. Me all in love at the third date and calling you drunk at 3 in the morning. Demanding you at my beck and call. Scary.”

I’m waiting now for the standard ‘you’re the only girl for me, the only one I’ve ever loved (which is true by the way you can ask him) so it didn’t really matter how silly you acted in the beginning'. Or something to that effect. When I was greeted with silence I looked over to see Jeremy squirming in his chair looking decidedly uncomfortable.

“What?” I asked, quite ominously.

“Well we probably wouldn’t have gotten together again otherwise”

Huh?

“I’ve been told I have a ‘damsel in distress’ syndrome where I like to rescue girls. Apparently I’ve a bit of a pattern.”

HUH!!!???!!

Needless to say that shut me right up. My whole perception of our relationship shattered with one admission! Thrown for a loop, I maintained an entire 2-minute silence before replying. I think I sputtered something like ‘ I can’t believe that’ and ‘this displeases me’, then fumed silently for a while. Well pouted.

Although this does explain a few things, like why none of Jeremy’s friends bothered to learn my name, speak to me or try to hide their thinly veiled disgust when I met them. Oh she’s one of those. And it’s not even the first time? Ugh really, some people.

Well maybe it wasn’t as bad as all that but still. I had to win them over. Like, try and junk. Man.