i had a dream last night

It was bizarre. Terrible and wonderful, it (like so many of my dreams), made me feel that waking pulled me from another reality. And no I was not on drugs. When I have these I am certain I am supposed to write them down, which I do, but I don’t finish them. I don’t flesh them out, adding details and depth. I’m hoping to change that. There is no urgency once I have recorded the basics; if I have notes I can recall the dream, the story and the feeling it wrought.

My dream last night had me shifting perspectives (as usual) and when I jotted down the details to help me remember, they became a poem of sorts. Strange I know but the whole thing struck me in such I way that I felt I had to share. Though it is hardly my best work.

It was very sad. But so beautiful, I wish I could give you more details than the poem reveals. Mayhap in time I will finish this story.

Notes on a dream, night of May 30, 2007

First I was the mother,
Choosing men over my child,
Sending him away, alone.

Then I was the child –
My own friend, playing with ants
And imagining armies.

Then I was the woman,
Childless, finding my family in a lonely boy,
Loving him as his mother never could.

Finally I became the observer,
Watching the sweet and sad reunion of
True mother and child mistakenly born to another.

i can cook

I may not be a gourmet cook or one who can make a meal fit for a king but I am a good cook. A simple if somewhat careless cook.

For our anniversary a few years back I made Jeremy din, including these crab & cream cheese wontons that were just delish. My specialty in University was hangover foods. An egg on English muffin breakfast sandwich, finely grated asiago cheese���.so yummy. Or a baked potato with melted cheddar, sour cream and green onions ��� a popular dish. Many mornings after a night out I would make one of these for all the people who passed out in our house. Sometimes I didn���t even know them (some treat someone had picked up from the bar no doubt). But they got breakfast. For Mother���s Day din at the pseudo in-laws I made delicious honey dijon deviled eggs and I ruined NOT A SINGLE EGG in the process. They were perfection - things of beauty, though I used a bag to fill them and subsequently they slightly resembled poops. As you can see.

But I digress.

For some reason Jeremy has gotten it into his head that I am a terrible cook who could burn water. Maybe it���s because when we started dating this time around I only ate takeout or was drunk most evenings and probably ruined a few meals. Who knows. So far I am barred from cooking dinner for us, which is okay as Jeremy is a good cook. However I am sick of doing the dishes. And I do miss cooking. I���ll just have to strong-arm my way back into the kitchen. Well more likely sneak. I���ll start with baking because I think Jeremy will find that less threatening. I���ll slowly embed myself as a regular part of the kitchen until he���s used to my presence, like they do with gorillas and such in their natural habitat. Then one day ��� BAM, I���ll be using the George Foreman grill. Mark my words. I will grill.

FANtastic

I was just looking through pics of hairstyles (I want a bit of a change) and I came across this. Wow. What do I need to do to get me one of these? It is magnificent. My little sister KT had a Sailor Mars costume one year but I must say it paled in comparison to this masterpiece. Stunning.

By the way I got a new addition to my toy collection. Cloud Strife ��� Le Sigh ��� from Kingdom Hearts. Delicious, a darker cloud complete with wing and claw. Now I just need the Advent Children Sepiroth and the original game version of Vincent Valentine! For now Cloud sits in front of King Conan and guards the throne (not that Conan needs anyone watching his back. Unless he has had too many wenches and too much mead).

"i sick"

Jeremy has pneumonia.

Mild pneumonia. Sigh. Jeremy loves being sick. He spent yesterday alternately cuddled up on the couch shivering or lying spread eagled in his underwear, sweating. Yes it���s an appetizing thought I know. Hopefully I only have to endure a few more days of him shaking his cup at me and demanding ���Appa Juice���. I would be really annoyed if it weren���t so adorable. Well okay it���s still annoying. I guess it can be both.



Sick Jeremy does not like having his picture taken. Meh.

clara paint shoptastic

I received paint shop from a friend....SO addictive. I have it at work now to and I���m using every excuse to make flyers and posters and whatnot. Luckily some people actually pay me to do that sort of thing for them.

Anyway I just installed it at home and spent the last two hours making this. A bit tacky? Perhaps. Or is it PERFECTION!!!?!?!?

The age old question peoples.

It does (in my humble and pretty awesome opinion) quite nicely reflect our personalities. So you can looking forward to some pretty over the top pictures as I play with it. At least until I get a new toy.

i think that i shall never see...

This is the view from our new apartment. Sigh. As the trees fill out it���ll get even better. This morning I sat out on my balcony and had a cup of tea and an apple oatmeal muffin that Jeremy made. He���s so domestic.

relocated

Well it has been awhile since I posted it really isn’t my fault. No it’s not Warcraft consuming all my time and attention – I finally moved! So I’ve been packing and cleaning and unpacking and whatnot like a madwoman. Jeremy helped too. Hee.

Anyway I have officially left downtown Toronto behind me (except for work everyday of course). No more break ins, loud shenanigans at 4am, sirens at all hours or mice and their fecal matter. Sigh. It was definitely time to leave but I will miss certain things I’m sure about being in the middle of it all. I haven’t gone far though; I’m now at Yonge & Eglinton which is funnily enough where I started my Toronto adventure. I don’t like the idea of taking the subway on a daily basis again but when I look at my gorgeous apartment it’s all worth it. There’s ROOM! For all kinds of stuff! And it’s clean and I have a buzz code and a storage locker and everything! Yay! I’ll post pics in a bit, after I unpack some more. I will tell you that it has been a challenge trying to find things for the new apartment that Jeremy and I can agree on. He likes very traditional things and I like the clean lines of modern décor. Meh. We can’t agree so we just take turns picking things. It’ll be interesting to see how it all turns out.